Things that pastors and PKs see

Here are a few things that I believe pastors and PKs (Pastors’ Kids) see that others sometimes miss.

1. The church and ministry, though mysterious in many ways, are also simply physical expressions of things that we choose to believe and the activities we choose to engage in
2. It is not the perfection of the participants or the leaders that makes a church (or makes the church effective)
3. The human side of the church sometimes seems like the predominant side. We have to consistently and prayerfully search for and listen for the presence of God and the work of God, because if not for a divine component, the church is underwhelming and easily degenerates into little or nothing
4. The pastor sometimes works harder than anyone in the church. This is not necessarily a good thing. More could be accomplished if the workload was spread out more. The pastor needs to spend more time with his/her family and making sure that they are personally holistically healthy
5. The pastor is very human. He/she acts impatient, unkind and unChristlike at various times. He/she gets very tired, worn out and runs out of energy to keep dealing with certain repetitive people/issues
6. If God isn’t real and grace isn’t real, then the pastor and the people are trying really hard to make themselves better. But they don’t always or necessarily succeed. And though church as religion and self-improvement might work for some, if people are not individually convinced that God and His grace are real, individuals won’t stick around because they’ve also seen the human (ugly) side of the pastor and the church.
7. Many pastors’ kids/families aren’t sure if God is real or not, because they have seen the activity of the pastor, the church, and the parishioners. The question still remains whether or not they have personally heard the voice of God and received the salvation/Holy Spirit of God. 
   1. The good things the church does are often weighed against the negative things that have happened in the church (and in the name of God) and if people (including PKs!) conclude that the bad outweighs the good, they will choose to leave. 
   2. Only if they sense that God’s grace is bigger than the human problems, and
   3. Only if they have personally sensed that God has spoken to them and that God has called them by name and that God has offered them salvation and that they are forgiven, will they choose to stick around in light of all of the problems they see
8. Some pastors’ kids/families as well as other individuals who visit the church, see how imperfect the various ministries of the church are. They have seen (and heard!) the lack of attendance, the shortfall of the goals, the lack of spiritual power, the effects of sinful/selfish behavior and they (some PK’s too!) sometimes decide that church is a lot of fluff, fakery, posing, posturing, hypocrisy, pretending and self-help nonsense.
   1. In short, if they aren’t convinced that God is real and present and that we are made Christians by His grace alone (and not by our perfection/performance) then they will simply find something else to fill their time with that is more captivating/engaging and seems to give them a better ROI
   2. Let us pray first that our own kids and families will taste and see that the Lord is good. May they each personally come to realize that people become Christians not because of how perfect, religious or pious they are. People become Christians not by all of the things they say or do (or how well they say or do those things). Instead may it be that our own kids and families will realize that we become Christians solely by the grace of God and that even when we fail and fall, our desire and goal is that we would get back up and keep walking with Jesus in faith. 
   3. And after we have prayed for our kids and families in this way, may we also remember that other people have been watching too and have seen the failings of Christians, pastors and churches, and let us pray that they too, will receive God’s grace and see that we are saved not by our our performance but by the price Jesus paid on Calvary.
   4. And finally let us pray for all of us who would call ourselves Christians, that we would seek to be humble and repentant, pursuing holiness in speech and conduct. And even when we fail, may we look once again to Jesus so that He will be pleased and He will have to opportunity to change us and continue using us (in spite of our imperfections) to lead others to Him.